The better question to ask

The right question has the potential to transform us.

How can we get into the habit of asking ourselves better questions? A better question can potentially shift how we perceive things, how we see ourselves, and more.

Perhaps by becoming a great self-investigative news anchor. This is something that has been on my mind for a while now.

Let me explain.

Since the pandemic started, I have been following the news via selective news channels. Relatively neutral channels. This is a scarce commodity, but I digress.

I also have, over the last year, started following certain anchors whom I feel have integrity. Another scarce commodity. Again I digress.

In this instance, I define integrity by the anchor’s professionalism and the ‘boundaries’ they operate within. This is quite subjective I realise but it is the lens I use to choose my news bites.

In the process, I have found good anchors and great anchors and what I believe separates them.

Good vs Great

What separates the good anchors from the great anchors is their ability to ask the questions that cut through the fluff to get to the heart of the matter.

The good anchors tend to ask more leading questions. A good skill to have.

A Leading question is a type of question that pushes respondents to answer in a specific manner, based on the way they are framed. More than often, these questions already contain information that the inquirer wants to confirm rather than try to get a true and unbiased answer to that question.

They ask questions to confirm the information held within the question.

This is fine to set the context but does not do much else. If subsequent questions are leading questions, the viewer (me) is often left wondering what the real matter was.

The great anchors, on the other hand, take the conversation to a depth that leaves the viewer with an understanding and appreciation of the core of the matter being discussed. This is achieved through the quality of the questions asked.

Make it stand out

Ask the better question.

Image by Graphic Mama from Pixabay

I recently experienced this when watching a Hard Talk interview on the British Broadcasting Corporation (BBC) with Stephen Sackur.

Though Hard Talk has some outstanding guests, what always gets my attention is Sackur’s ability to ask the right questions at the right time. Hard questions asked dispassionately and politely.

Priceless, because it enabled a path to the heart of the matter. I could see a shift in his guest’s emotions, and I certainly felt it too.

How can we ask ourselves better questions?

I often wonder how we potentially deceive or sabotage ourselves by asking ourselves only leading questions.

Leading questions are necessary when we need to validate or confirm our thinking. But the better question takes us to the heart of the matter.

Good questions help set context but great questions help us create new realities.

This reminds me of a quote by Mark Twain, ‘It ain’t what you don’t know that gets you into trouble. It’s what you know for sure that just ain’t so.’

This Mark Twain quote alludes to the difference between fact and opinion. When we believe what we think is a fact when it is an opinion, and that opinion may not be correct.

Worse is when we believe something is a fact when it is only an opinion and a wrong one, we end up holding ourselves back.

Take my story that I was not capable of writing. I held a belief, for a long time, that I could not write.

I believed it to be a fact but later realised it was only an opinion. After all, I had never written anything in the past so how could I know this for sure.

It was an opinion and a wrong one. One that kept me from sharing my thoughts for years!

I asked myself, ‘what if this were not true?’ and set off to validate it by writing.

And that is how my intermittent relationship with writing started over a decade ago. It has become a weekly ritual that I actually look forward to since I re-commenced writing 10 months ago.

Had I not asked myself the better question, I would not have experienced what I have.

How to ask yourself the better question

Where are you getting your facts and opinions confused?

Start with your stories. The stories you tell yourself about yourself. Wherever you have a story that is not working for you, check if it is a fact or opinion.

If you think you are not good at nurturing relationships, validate if it is a fact or opinion.

If you feel you are not a good communicator, validate if it is fact or opinion.

Image by terimakasih0 from Pixabay

And so on. Even if you have had feedback suggesting it may be a fact, ask for further clarification.

So much can be misinterpreted in a conversation through misaligned assumptions, language, and more.

Always ask the better question. Become a great self-investigative news anchor.

Questions are a powerful way to unleash potential. Potential that could otherwise go undiscovered.

I am here to help.