We are accountable to ourselves. We carry the responsibility for reading and understanding our thinking and subsequent actions. This responsibility is certainly tested when we are under pressure.

Our true selves show up when we are under pressure. By pressure I mean dealing with the unexpected, an external disruption beyond your control such as being sabotaged by a colleague, reprimanded in public, etc.

Trying to centre yourself when your mind is racing is like trying to rein in wild horses.

It is an external stimulus impacting our internal environment. I call this having an episode when the external world triggers our internal equilibrium. We have all experienced this at some point in our lives and we usually act according to our interpretation of the situation.

It is our self-awareness that plays an important role on how effectively we regain our clarity and composure. The experience and outcome are unique to us. But there are some key actions you can take to read and interpret your situation better:

1.      Time and silence

Create time and space to allow your mind to do the mental somersaults and punches that it needs to do. Time and silence are great catalysts to regaining your clarity. Resisting the temptation to react is the hardest thing to do but that which teaches us the most. Do not try to still your mind now either it will not work. With time, as the mental chaos dissipates some calm will return. This allows the subconscious mind to get to work on possible paths forward.

2.      Talk to a trusted friend or mentor

What you need is support. Not so much help with deciphering your thoughts but support from someone who has your back. Talk to a friend or family member who knows you well who can give you this support. This person should also be able to let you know if you begin to sound like a scratched record.

Alternatively, talk to your mentor who can advise you, provide directive feedback and walk the journey with you. A confidant who can provide unbiased, non-judgemental advice.

Resist telling others, besides your friend or mentor, about your situation. They may not fully understand your predicament and could potentially make it worse for you.

To quote the infamous Pablo Escobar, ‘never tell your problems to everyone, 80% don’t care and the other 20% are glad you have them’.

3.      Move

Do not remain physically still. Movement helps dissipate the mental angst. The body translates this mental angst into wanting to retreat, shut down or worse, attack. Resist either temptation. If you need to hunker down for a few moments to understand what is going on that is fine, after which MOVE. Shake it out.

Change your posture take a more open stance. Amy Cuddy, a social psychologist’s work on the body mind connection focuses on using the body to change the mind.

Tiny tweaks can lead to big changes.

4.      Breathe

Our breathing becomes very shallow when we are having episodes. It takes conscious effort to restore our breathing. Breathing helps shift the physical and mental grip on us. Just as movement helps the mind, breathing helps the body and mind. With time you feel the grip on you, both physically and mentally, shift.

With time and experience we get better at processing these episodes. It is a journey in self-awareness. The more aware we are and understand our subtle nuance, the less daunting these episodes become.

For personalised advice or mentorship email me at yoga@yoganesadurai.com