It all happened in under 10 seconds! 7 years ago, I was waiting at the traffic lights. It had just turned red. I was 2 cars behind the lights when I heard a loud sound and wondered what it was. Then it struck me. I was broken into, through the passenger window of my car, for my handbag! Just like that in a blink of an eye, my handbag was snatched. It happened so fast that it felt like my brain took longer to work it out. The sound was jarring. It was the sound of breaking glass.

We have a snatch theft problem in Malaysia. Men on motorbikes, usually 2, ride past an unassuming walker, usually women (though few men are targets too for their chains), relieving them of their bags in a heartbeat. The pillion rider does the work. This phenomenon progressed to targeting women, driving solo, in cars. The attraction is the handbag on the passenger seat.

The duo would first ride past the potential victim’s car to spot the bag on the passenger seat. Once spotted, they then decide quickly on the traffic light to carry out their act. This usually happens in a district they are familiar with, and conditions have to be right for success.

On that fateful day, I had just left the hospital after a follow-up consultation with my doctor. I had a procedure done 2 weeks before that day on my sinuses. The follow-up required nasal manipulation and I left the hospital feeling grateful it was over but in a bit of pain. That threw me off my usual standard operation procedure when getting into my car.

I put my handbag on the passenger seat. I NEVER do that. But that day I had my medication in my left hand. As I got into the car, I placed the medication on the passenger seat and unconsciously placed my handbag with it. My brain tried to alert me that something felt wrong, but I did not pay much attention! My home was less than a 7-minute drive and I wanted to get home. I paid the price for not listening to my subconscious!

My snatch thief backstory

There is not much I fear or have feared in my life, but I am cautious of a handful of things. I have a mindset of prevention rather than cure. And to clarify, I am referring to fear from our own thinking either through imbued beliefs (fact or opinion) or experience. I exclude phobias here.

One of my cautions was snatch thieves. Before my incident, I was first to warn my foreign visitors about the dangers of snatch thieves. Whenever I met up with my friends, colleagues, clients who were female with handbags I would make sure they were careful about their handbags.

I knew close friends and family who were victims of snatch thieves and thought it was a situation that was easily avoided. So, I made it a point to do my part whenever the need arose, often sounding like a scratched record.

Unbeknown to me, my cautionary stance was (subconsciously) fear and eventually became an outcome. In my article last week, I mentioned that we most often create the outcomes that we fear. Though last week’s examples were from a McKinsey article, my friend raised the same point when I told her about my incident. And it made sense. I told her that I took great pains to warn everyone else, but eventually, I became a victim. Though I thought I was coming from a precautionary stance it was fear.

So, what are your fears? What are situations that you warn others or caution yourself about? Was there a time, like me, when you warned others about a ‘danger’ but succumbed to it yourself?

Edith Eger in her book, The Gift, says that “we aren’t born with fear. Somewhere along the way we learn it”. Fears are a part of us and can potentially hold us back. Working on our fears is part of identity development. Taking small imperfect steps towards mitigating our fears is our challenge. These questions may be helpful in mitigating your fears:

• Are your fears realistic? Are they derived from fact or opinion?

• What is the impact of your fear - what are you sacrificing because of it?

• What are some things you can do to reframe it or face it head-on?

• How can you follow through on your chosen options?

I am still following my standard operating procedure now when I get into my car, but I am no longer fixated. This fear has lost its grip on me. Though easier said than done, it is best to face fear head-on.

As always, you can reach me at yoga@yoganesadurai.com